The last few days we have done several posts that discussed last year’s campaign, the blogospheric meltdown and Obamanation’s efforts to rewrite recent history. These posts have triggered an upsurge in a blogospheric malady known as Lying Obot Optical Neuropathy Syndrome (LOONS).
LOONS is a condition unique to Obama supporters and it is currently unknown whether it is a congenital defect or is chemically induced (or as my grandma would say “Is he drunk or stupid?) People with LOONS (“loonies”) are incapable of seeing things that are right in front of them and obvious to everyone else. There is speculation that the condition is caused by the use of Kool-aid goggles.
Loonies have much in common with Holocaust deniers. Now I’m not comparing what happened last year to the Holocaust, which was one of the most horrific events in all of recorded history. But despite massive amounts of physical evidence and eyewitness testimony some people cling to the belief that 6 million Jews committed suicide in a conspiracy to make the Nazis look bad.
According to the loonies, Left Blogistan was a genteel and civilized place until supporters of Hillary Clinton launched an unprovoked racist jihad on peace-loving Obama supporters. When presented with reams and terabytes of evidence to the contrary the loonies are incapable of seeing it and will stubbornly deny its existence.
Never argue with loonies, it wastes your time and the loonies enjoy it. They exhibit an obsessive-compulsive need to stalk and harass non-loonies, badgering them with “Who are you going to believe, me or your lying eyes?” attacks. The only known way to cure loonies involves a sound-proof room, duct tape and a large dead fish.
Other symptoms of LOONS include bad personal hygiene, impaired cognition and logical thinking skills, excessive wanking and permanent virginity. Many loonies exhibit erotic fantasies involving goats and bizarre S&M fantasies wherein they are dominated by cougars and pumas. A handful of these loonies also fetishize cuts of meat from the beef hindquarters. This latter group are called “rump roasters.”